Second Chanced
I began to straighten my desk before going home when Beth tossed
an envelope on my desk and tried to hustle away.
"Hey, what's
this?" The envelope was damp, and the mail arrived at our office like
clockwork right after lunch.
She turned back,
puffing and pouting. Today's bedazzled shirt featured aqua and magenta dolphins.
Better than the silver and gold porcupine. Randy'd told her never to wear that
one again.
"Dunno it
came that way sorry." She turned again, and I let her leave this time. Not
worth delaying my own escape from cubicle hell.
The envelope was
heavy, textured paper a delicate cream color not typically seen by a desk
monkey like myself. I was lucky to have received it at all from Beth's grabby
hands.
I looked inside
and smiled. There was another envelope within, black sealing wax protecting it.
I looked again at the outer one, blank but for my name in black
calligraphy.
The wax was sealed
with an embellished 2 twined with a D. Driscoll hadn't lied after all.
***
"I don't get
it D. You've just got all the luck," I had moped, on the way to drowning
my sorrows. D was paying, and damn well should. The only paid itinerant
philosopher I'd ever heard of, he loved life and lived like I always wished I
could.
"Well, it
isn't all luck Ray. I had to suck a lot of dick to get where I am today, you
know." He slapped me on the back and guffawed. I elbowed him off.
"I always
thought we'd end up in the same place, man. How'd you fucking do it?" I
slapped the table. D got all serious for a minute, looked me right in the
eye.
"Hey, if I
can tell you, I will. You'll know it when it comes," he paused, and the
intensity in his eyes had me biting at the bait. "But you better be ready
to suck a lot of dick!"
***
I rubbed my right
hand, still bruised from that outburst.
I cracked the wax.
More fine paper and black ink. A simple message, in simple script.
The library.
Midnight.
***
It could only be
one library, the old neighborhood extension where D and I would be sent to
return videos by our mothers. I think they hoped the books would rub smarts off
on us.
I walked. Mom had died years ago, but I never escaped the neighborhood. I'd move out someday, when I got that promotion Randy had dangled to keep me on until the recession made any job a commodity in and of itself. Yeah, right.
The library was
sandwiched between a tanning joint and a cash store, both closed for the night.
The area was deserted, too boring even for trouble-making kids
to bother with. I settled beneath the frayed, moonlight bleached awning to wait.
At precisely
midnight, a tiny car pulled up and an elegant woman in an androgynous black
suit stepped out. Her hair was pulled back tightly, and her movements were
crisp as she walked up to me. She examined me toe to unkempt hair with a steady
gaze, as if the shadows in which I hid had no meaning for her. A nod.
"Did I pass?"
Not even a flicker
of a smile.
"Raymond
Claude Heller, 35 years old, mired in a dead-end job pushing papers while the
life you thought you'd have drifts out of your reach." Her voice was soft,
almost sweet, but I flinched at the content. "No living family, no steady
girlfriends, no community ties."
I clenched and
unclenched my fists as her recitation ended. She just stood there, watching me
fight not to punish the messenger. So I had a shitty life, no reason to strike
a lady. No reason at all.
"What you
need, Ray, is a second chance. The question that I seek to answer for the sake
of my employers is: would you use it well?"
I laughed.
"What the
fuck are you talking about?"
She smiled, just a
small curve of the lips, and put her hand out.
I shook hands with
her. She gave a good firm handshake, not like so many women’s boneless clasp.
A rushing swelled in my ears, and the woman faded from sight. I was
falling against the wall behind me as the world faded into an ethereal mist. A
crystal dolphin swam through the mist in front of me, turned to pin me with one
ruby eye.
"What would
you change Ray?" it asked with a voice like ocean waves inside my skull. I
tried to speak, but I had no mouth, no words, so I thought.
I’d get a life.
The dolphin shook its head at me. Fine.
I'd go to college
out of state, break out of the old neighborhood. I'd make something of
myself.
The dolphin
executed a loop and made as if to swim away. If it left, I'd never get my
second chance, the chance to replay my life with the conviction I should have
always had but just didn't. All those almosts, and might-have-beens would be in
my grasp if I could just-
I thought of
Jillian Forrest. She'd be the one who got away, if I’d ever had her. I'd never
had the balls even to ask her out, but I heard years later that she'd have said
yes. At her wake.
A new vision of my life began to grow in my mind, of me and Jillian, having children, working hard and loving each other, D, the visiting uncle my kids would love not just for the presents he brought but the love and attention he gave them, the hope that they could do whatever they dreamed when they grew up.
A new vision of my life began to grow in my mind, of me and Jillian, having children, working hard and loving each other, D, the visiting uncle my kids would love not just for the presents he brought but the love and attention he gave them, the hope that they could do whatever they dreamed when they grew up.
The dolphin looped
closer now.
"Love?"
it asked. "Is that enough?"
Yes, I thought,
and the mist began to thicken, obscuring my vision into darkness.
End
This story is in response to the Flash Fiction Challenge on Chuck Wendig's blog, terribleminds. http://terribleminds.com/ramble/2013/03/22/flash-fiction-challenge-ten-words-will-give-you-five/
The words I ended up with were: Envelope, Dolphin, Ethereal, Library and Replay.
The words I ended up with were: Envelope, Dolphin, Ethereal, Library and Replay.
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